How it works

Getting started is easy

You make the hard decisions once, at a calm moment. After that, the bag makes them for you, the same way every time.

Choose your pack. Pick the pack for your kid's age. Every pack has 15 tiles, each one age-appropriate, plus the Get Out of Trouble Free tile.
Pick your 10 together, at a calm time. Not right after a meltdown. Go through all 15 with your kid and choose 10. You have the final say. Add the free pass, and practice a draw.
Warn once. Say it plainly: “If you throw that food on the ground again, it's the bag.” Hurting someone skips the warning. Accidents never go to the bag.
If it happens again, say one word. “Bag.” Your kid reaches in and draws one tile without looking.
Do it right away. Whatever comes out. Sometimes it fits perfectly, sometimes it's lighter or harsher. No negotiating. The bag decided.
Close it out. “Done. Thank you. Fresh start.” The tile goes back in the bag. No lecture.

The rules of the bag

These stay the same from three years old to eighteen.

Every pack has 15 tiles. You and your kid pick 10 together, and you have the final say. Add the Get Out of Trouble Free tile, and that's your bag.
The draw decides. Sometimes the tile fits what happened perfectly, sometimes it's lighter or harsher. That's the point: nobody picked it in the moment.
Warn once. If it happens again, it's the bag. Hurting someone skips the warning.
Accidents and honest mistakes never go to the bag.
Draw without looking.
No negotiating and no redraws once a tile is drawn. If a tile feels too harsh, talk about why afterward. Don't change it.
Do it right away, or as soon as you can.
The tile goes back in the bag.
Stay neutral. The bag decided, not you.
Every bag has a Get Out of Trouble Free tile.
From age five, the free pass cancels the consequence, never the repair. If someone got hurt, your kid still makes it right.
From age seven, the free pass doesn't cover a lie. Own it and you keep your free pass. Cover it up and the free pass comes out of the bag before the draw.
As kids grow, they get more say in which 10 go in. Change the 10 at a family meeting, never in the moment.

Optional for teens: tell first, draw two. If your teen tells you before you find out, they draw two tiles and keep the lighter one.

Print the House Rules Card and tape it inside the bag.

Who picks the tiles

My first bag was eleven pieces of paper. My boys wrote ten of them. Now every pack gives you 15 tiles and you pick 10. You always have the final say. As your kid grows, hand them more of the picking.

Ages 3 to 5: you pick the 10, and your kid names the pictures and picks a favorite or two.
Around 7: your kid reads all 15 and picks some of the 10.
Ages 10 to 11: your kid proposes their 10 and you approve them.
Ages 12 to 13: you pick the 10 together at a family meeting.
Ages 14 to 15: your teen picks the 10 and you edit.
Ages 16 to 18: your teen picks the 10 and signs the contract. You keep the final say.
Adults: no bag, just agreements you write together.

Common questions

What if they draw a tile that doesn't fit what they did?

That's how it's supposed to work. Every tile in the bag is fair for your kid's age, you picked them together, and the bag decides which one. Sometimes it's lighter than what happened, sometimes harsher, and once in a while it's the free pass. Luck runs both ways. Nobody picked it, so there's nothing to argue about. No redraws. If it felt too harsh, talk about why afterward.

My kid refuses to draw.

With a little kid, draw together, or say “I'll pick for you this time” and draw for them. With an older kid, calmly explain that not drawing means losing a privilege until they're ready to draw.

What if they peek in the bag?

They already know the rule, so there's no warning. They finish the tile they drew, then draw again.

Should I use the bag for everything?

No. It comes out after a warning, or right away if someone got hurt. Accidents, honest mistakes and things your kid is still learning get help and patience, not the bag.